The lists have been neat, and I’ve learned many things about my social network friends who have done lists. Yesterday though, was breathtaking.
"10. When my mom died I held her and touched her till she went cold. I could not stop sniffing her. I never want to forget her smell and her smooth skin."
I quickly read through the rest of the list, and then went back to #10. I re-read #10. And re-read it again.
I was speechless, stunned, a puddle of tears, and grateful for being allowed to be included in such a deep, intimate, personal detail.
Twenty four hours later I am still pondering the depths of #10. Instant tears I have flowing freely down my cheeks every time I read #10.
I have yet to lose someone close to me. And no one, as far as I know, is nearing death. So my response seems puzzling. I’m not grieving a death, nor am I anticipating a death.
Why am I so moved? Why the depths of emotion?
Lavish love. I read #10 and it is what a life lived being lavishly loved, looks like. A daughter, showing one last act of deep love to her mom.
When I was pregnant, a big concern for me was that I would not love my child as deeply (or at all) as a mom should. Many days I’d rock in my glider, with my hands on my belly, praying to God that He give me a heart that loved this child (I prayed in the singular for a long time since we didn’t know I was carrying twins until the eighth month).
I prayed to Him that I’d love the way Jesus loves—no strings attached. I knew I needed Him for that kind of love, since, being human, I’m selfish, self-centered, and demand my own way.
God is so good. He does answer prayers. I am astounded, really, by how He continually transforms my heart. Not only do I love my children, but I love people, even those that are really hard to love, if ya know what I mean.
The definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13 is beautiful, magnificent,and awe-inspiring.
"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
I want to love like that.
As my relationship with God grows, as I am humbled by His grace and His love for me, and as I remain focused on Him, it’s easier to love God’s way—agape love.
#10 is lavish love, and a sobering reminder of just how fleeting all of our lives on Earth really are.
While I'm here, whether it is for a day, a decade, or several decades, I choose to love lavishly.